Growing in the Virtue of Meekness

“Blessed are the meek” (Matthew 5:5). 

St. Bernard said, “It is impossible to govern well without meekness.” ¹ Yet, the idea of meekness often evokes images of submissiveness, passivity, and even helplessness. In a culture of strong independence and self-determination, we consider meekness a hindrance to our goals and personal power. Yet, in the realm of Catholic wisdom, it is the counterbalance to the fiery vice of wrath, which is unbridled anger. 

Everyone is familiar with anger. Most of us experience it in some form every day.  “He makes me so mad!” “I’m so frustrated! She never lets me talk!” Words like these are commonly expressed at home, at work, or with friends.

As Catholics, we know that unchecked anger is dangerous and easily leads to sin, but we make light of this vice, even looking forward to the opportunity to air our frustrations. We may even consider anger a strength because it makes us feel powerful and justified. Convinced that it can be kept under control, we minimize the harm it can do to our relationships and spiritual life. Because of this, we fail to seek anger’s true remedy – the virtue of meekness. 

Sacred Scripture and spiritual writings are full of references to meekness and its rewards. Our Lord presented this virtue as one of the few to be sought in the Beatitudes. He referred to Himself as meek and humble of heart. Since Jesus places such great value on meekness, we want to study it more closely and consider how it can transform our lives.

Understanding the Virtue of Meekness

Meekness, sometimes thought of as gentleness, is a sub-virtue of temperance. It moderates anger and controls any impulse of resentment toward our neighbor. It is exemplified in the Sermon on the Mount when Jesus tells His disciples, “Do not resist one who is evil. But if anyone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also; and if anyone would sue you and take your coat, let him have your cloak as well…” (Matthew 5:39-41). Jesus is illustrating the strength of the Christian, who cannot lose anything to the evil man, for he has entrusted all that he is and has to God. 

To become angry in the face of insults or human struggles is to lose our temper. It often feels right in the moment, but in our souls, we realize we have, indeed, lost something – inner peace, and certainly charity.

Furthermore, as the saints point out, if we give in to anger, becoming enraged or even exasperated, we often regret the loss of control and the resulting damage to relationships. They caution us to remember that in the heat of anger, we do not see clearly.

We easily misinterpret the situation or the offender’s intent. We know this to be true between spouses, family members, or friends. So often arguments ensue because of misunderstandings. But meekness waits to respond. It weighs the situation and understands that anger begets anger, but “a soft answer turns away wrath” (Prov 15:1).

In a sermon on the Sin of Anger, Saint Alphonsus Liguori illustrates the Proverb above in the story of a travelling monk. As the monk walked along, he saw the need to pass through a corn field, but shortly after entering, he was accosted by the owner of the field. Enraged by the monk’s intrusion, the owner “spoke to him in offensive and injurious language. The monk humbly replied: Brother, you are right; I have done wrong; pardon me. By this, the [owner] was so much appeased that he instantly became calm and even wished to follow the monk, and to enter into religion.” ²

Here we begin to see the power of this virtue – its power to overcome our pride and vanquish the devil. Meekness, a result of peaceful self-control, increases humility in our hearts and offers grace and light to those who mistreat us. It is a mirror of Christ, Who offered His blood in forgiveness for the very men who mocked, abused, and crucified Him. 

The Importance of Meekness for Growth in Holiness

“The meek turn the contempt and insults offered them into an occasion of advancing in humility.” – St. Alphonsus ²

To become holy is to become like Christ, which is to advance in the supernatural virtues. Our Lord said, “[L]earn of Me, because I am meek, and humble of heart: and you shall find rest for your souls” (Matthew 11:29). These two virtues, meekness and humility, go hand in hand. They encapsulate the New Commandment Jesus gives to His disciples: To love God and love our neighbor. 

St. Francis de Sales expounds on this, saying, “Humility perfects us with respect to God, and meekness with respect to our neighbor.” ³  As we grow in humility, charity increases. Humbly recognizing our blindness and need for a Savior, we become more compassionate towards our neighbor – even one who appears to be an enemy.

We see that “the enemy” who insults or seeks to harm us is indeed a friend advancing us along the path of holiness. When this becomes our reality, we cease to respond to offenses with pride and bitterness, but instead, with charity, expressed in meekness. This charity quells the agitation in our neighbor and in our own hearts, giving rest to our souls.

Our Lord, speaking to St. Catherine of Sienna in the Dialogue, says, “so far as the soul loves Me, she loves her neighbor because love towards him issues from Me . . . [since] you can do Me no profit, you should do it to your neighbor.” ⁴ By this, we understand that meekness, the expression of love for our neighbor, is the action of our love for God. That’s why it is indispensable for growth in holiness. 

Saints on the Virtue of Meekness 

The saints guide us by their lives and their words in the virtue of meekness.   

St. Francis de Sales was known to radiate charity in his countenance, always serene and loving, “a living reflection of Christ’s meekness,” said St. Vincent de Paul. St. Francis urged Christians to control anger and to win others with the meekness of Christ. He wrote: 

• “Humble meekness is the virtue of virtues, which God has so much recommended to us; therefore, we should endeavor to practice it always and in all things.” 
• “Do not accept any pretext whatever for opening your heart’s door to anger.” 
• “Speak all your words and do all your actions, whether little or great, in the mildest way you can.” 
• “There is nothing that gives so much edification to our neighbor as meekness of behavior.” ^{1, 3}

St. Vincent of Paul, preaching to religious, said, “Affability, love, and humility… are a wonderful means of winning the hearts of men, and of leading them to embrace what is most repugnant to nature.” He instructed superiors that ruling in meekness was the best means of inspiring obedience. ¹

“Meekness is a virtue,” says St. Thomas Aquinas, “in which nobility of soul is found. When provoked by words or actions, the servants of God remain serene and calm, thus revealing perfect nobility of soul, capable of overlooking all rudeness.” ¹

St. Alphonsus Liguori preached more than one sermon on the necessity of this virtue for the Christian life. He said, 

• “[Meekness] is called the virtue of the lamb – that is, the beloved virtue of Jesus Christ. Because, like a lamb, without anger or even complaint, He bore the sorrows of His passion and crucifixion.” ²
• “As gold is tried by fire, so the meekness of men is proved by humiliation.” ²

And St. John Chrysostom praised this virtue, saying, “There is nothing better calculated to draw others to God than to see a Christian meek and cheerful when he receives an injury or an insult.” ²

These and other saints drew upon the example of Christ to guide them in their conduct when difficulties arose in their duties or when assailed with insults and persecutions. They meditated on Sacred Scripture to form their Catholic responses to the issues of their day. Let us, too, consider the wisdom of the Bible to gain insight into how this virtue applies to our lives. 

Scriptural Teachings on Meekness

Jesus is our pattern in all the virtues. The Gospels teach us, through His life, death, and resurrection, how to live and love. We see meekness in the gentle manner he uses with his disciples and with sinners. Jesus was not making up new ways of being, but rather fulfilling the commandments already given by God to His people. Meekness was praised as a shining virtue in the earliest writings of the Old Testament. 

Moses, the friend of God, exemplified meekness. The scripture tells us in Numbers chapter 12 that “Moses was very meek, more than all men that were on the face of the earth.” Sirach 45 says, “[God] sanctified [Moses] through faithfulness and meekness; He chose him out of all mankind.” Moses repeatedly prayed for the Israelites when they complained against God. He stood between them and God’s judgment, an image of Christ’s mediation for us. 

At one point, his own family began to murmur, resentfully questioning whether God truly spoke through Moses alone. Displeased, God struck them with leprosy, reprimanding them, and saying that unlike other prophets, “With Moses, I speak mouth to mouth, clearly, and not in dark speech; and he beholds the form of the Lord” (Numbers 12: 8). Later in this passage, Moses demonstrates his meekness by praying to the Lord to heal those whom He struck, not seeking vengeance for his detractors, but forgiveness. 

God attends to the meek, as the Psalmist proclaims: “O Lord, Thou wilt hear the desire of the meek; Thou wilt strengthen their heart, Thou wilt incline Thy ear” (Ps 10:17).

“For the fear of the Lord is wisdom and instruction, and He delights in fidelity and meekness (Sirach 1:27).

In the New Testament, we find this virtue among all the others as exemplifying Christian character. 

St. Paul urges us “to lead a life worthy of the calling to which [we] have been called, with all lowliness and meekness, with patience, forbearing one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Eph 4:1-2). Meekness is the picture of forbearance and patient endurance of each other’s faults. 

Again, he tells the Colossians to “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, and patience” (Colossians 3:12).

And St. James asks, “Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good life let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom” (James 3:13). Here and in Sirach, we see meekness as a companion and fruit of wisdom. 

Let’s consider how we can learn to put meekness into practice in our lives.  

Practical Ways to Grow in the Virtue of Meekness

We become more like Our Lord by grace through the Sacraments and prayer. But we must also make intentional efforts to overcome the self-serving vice of anger and to develop the habit of responding with meekness. Here are a few considerations to help us in our endeavors. 

1. Begin by honestly recognizing our limited scope, which often leads us to err in our interpretation of our neighbor’s words and actions. The saints caution us to have a hearty distrust of ourselves – to remember we are laden with faults and likely to misinterpret many things. Our faults should not discourage us, but we should acknowledge them and pray for the grace of humility and compassion.
2. Meditate on Christ in His Passion as the greatest model of meekness. Reflecting on  Christ’s boundless love for sinners, all of us, we are ignited with a burning desire to return that love by imitating Him. We can read Scripture or a book that guides us through the meditations so that Christ’s meekness toward those who tortured and mocked Him sinks deep into our souls.
3. Look ahead and plan to bear peacefully with little insults or inconveniences. Pray for light to see them as opportunities for grace. We can make reparation by enduring annoyances with a joyful spirit, transforming negative experiences into active help for our souls and the souls of others. What is the “impossible thing” you are praying for? Offer up insults or irritations in meekness to obtain the answer to that prayer. 
4. Examine the causes of anger within ourselves. This reflection can help us to see our triggers, which the devil knows well and will use against us if we remain unaware. It teaches us how to pray for strength against these triggers and also whether additional help, such as counseling, is necessary to address them. 
5. Go to Confession. The Sacrament of Confession obtains for us the grace to overcome the sins and faults that we struggle with. If we lack meekness, we can focus on those temptations to anger or self-defense in the Confessional and gain great strength against these vices.  
6. Refrain from speaking or acting when angry. The saints advocate for calming the spirit before responding. They remind us that mild responses quell the anger of others. Once we are peaceful, then the matter can be discussed and corrections made if necessary, always keeping in mind the good of the other.  
7. Go to Our Lady. She is the Queen of Peace and will remind us of her silence in the face of unspeakable torment as she stood under the Cross. Through the intercession of Mary and in union with Her, we can endure the crosses that come our way, joining our suffering with Hers and that of Her Son. 

The Lamb of God: Christ’s Perfect Meekness

“He shall be led as a sheep to the slaughter and shall be silent as a lamb before his shearer, and he shall not open his mouth.” Isaiah 53:7

Jesus is the Lamb of God, particularly in His Passion. Recalling St. Alphonsus’ words: meekness is the virtue of the lamb – no fighting or struggling to escape, only a peaceful, loving acceptance of God’s will. In His meekness, the Lamb of God reveals the supreme expression of charity and trust in the Father, obedience without reservation.

In Christ’s Passion, we see meekness in the midst of suffering as the fruit of love. Love for God and love for humanity. In the face of betrayal, false accusations, and unspeakable agony, Christ responded not with vengeance but with a quiet strength imbued with divine love. His mission in union with the Holy Trinity was to redeem rather than condemn.

His meekness, expressed through heroic patience, triumphed over evil to bring about restoration and peace between God and man. Through Christ’s action, we come to understand meekness as power and strength, more powerful than resentment, than anger unleashed, or a quest for vengeance. It is the power to save.

Moreover, throughout Christ’s ministry, His treatment of both His followers and opponents reveals a practice of meekness that does not undermine His truth and authority. There was no hesitation in Him when speaking against false prophets and the sin that corrupts the soul. Yet in wisdom, He was often silent in response to jeers and opposition, and merciful to the end. “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” 

Meekness strengthens rather than diminishes; it empowers us to navigate life’s complexities with courage rooted in humility and charity, and tempered with wisdom. Learning of Christ, meek and humble of Heart, transforms us, impacts our neighbor, and brings rest to the soul. Let us open our hearts to meekness, distrusting ourselves and trusting in God.

Then we can wait unafraid in the serenity of the saints for the revelation of His will in each moment, knowing that He Who loves us will use everything, especially our neighbor, to work for the good of our souls.  As  St. Teresa said, “Lord, You know all things, can do all things, and You love me.” ⁵

1. Daughters of St. Paul. Spiritual Diary: Selected Sayings and Examples of Saints. Boston, Daughters of St. Paul, 1962. Internet Archive, https://archive.org/details/spiritualdiaryse00bost/page/n7/mode/2up. Accessed 13 September 2025. ↩︎
2. Liguori, Alfonso Maria de’. The Sermons of St. Alphonsus Liguori for All the Sundays of the Year. TAN Books and Publishers, 1982. ↩︎
3. Sales, Francis de. Introduction to the Devout Life. Translated by John K. Ryan, Second Edition, New York: Doubleday, 1972, 1989. ↩︎
4. Siena, Catherine Of. The Dialogue of St. Catherine of Siena: A Conversation with God on Living Your Spiritual Life to the Fullest. Translated by Algar Thorold, Tan Books, 1991 ↩︎
5. Garrigou-Lagrange, Reginald. Providence. Translated by Bede Rose, O.S.B., D.D., Tan Books, 1998. ↩︎